TESTIMONIALS
Pregnant mothers' testimonials of the Prenatal Mindfulness Relationship-Based (PMRB) Program
"Thank you so much, Antonella! Your course was lovely. Even if it was not the birth I wished, your course taught me to see the whole beautiful experience.I didn’t feel like a failure at all. I think hypnobirthing may contribute to trauma as it feeds the expectation of vaginal birth too much. But your course taught me not to feed rigid expectations. I can still have a vagina birth next time. If I cried during pregnancy or labour because of the hormones, I didn’t feel rubbish but accepted it as part of the process, I was self-compassionate, as I learnt during your course. Even when the baby cries now, rather than being annoyed and questioning what I have done wrong or is wrong with the baby, being triggered or trying to fix it, I try strategies, walking or holding her on the couch. I just think, “Nothing is wrong”, it is what it is, being with the baby, so the baby knows that you are there for him/her.
Lilly sleeps well. But the point is not that she sleeps for 7 hours but that she gets a short sleep and needs us and falls asleep again and this is fine for us. The moment we stopped doing what they taught us about baby’s sleep during the course but only relaying on her cues, the anxiety subsided, and we went with the flow". ZIA
"I really enjoyed my first session on Thursday night, you clearly know a great deal about pregnancy and mindfulness and much of the commentary around the medicalisation and unnecessary interference in the birth process resonated with my lived experience. You course and the mindfulness abilities I learnt helped me dealing with the baby’s challenges with acceptance. I would never say to the baby, “Don’t cry”, if he is crying but just accept his emotions. I ask him how he is feeling about something, rather than wondering what has caused it. So, if I have a hard time, I accept it. I separate my emotion from myself, giving me permission to feel this way. I’m taking 1 year off to look after and enjoy my baby, but I might take more if I need to". SMILIE - Midwife
"The 9-week program taught me the importance and benefits of being mindful, both in pregnancy and everyday life, as well as meditating to connect with self and baby! It gave me the tools I needed to be able to commit to doing both on a regular basis which allowed me to see positive changes occurring in my life! The most outstanding aspect of the mindfulness-based program was the connection with the baby, the breathing practice and relaxation of the jaw. The final hour of labour was about focusing on the process, being with, not so much being calm, as it is a powerful process, you cannot really be calm. I had decided to give home birth before the course. The baby has good sleeping patterns. He had the longest sleep, 7 hours before breastfeeding. The key is tuning into the baby, and quality of sleep results from this attunement. I intend to breastfeed until we both enjoy. Father is doing really well, although he grew up without siblings. KATIE
""Mindfulness practice helped me feel the emotion, let it happen, without holding back, and focus on the positive. It helped me elaborate the regret of the emergency caesarean induced by the fear of scar rupture from previous caesarean.The hospital considered the risk of having another caesarean and transmitted this to me during pregnancy. But learning to be mindful helped let the milk flow and me bond with my baby. The pain subsided and I didn’t need to take painkillers because of the mindfulness attitude. The midwife acknowledged and validated my feelings". AILEEN
"I am loving your book chapter I read at home as part of the home practice! I am still in the first chapter but has touched me already. I also really connected with the meditation, it was really profound, the easiest so far to drop in. Both your book and the meditation have helped me expand the communication with the baby". SARAH
"It is a pleasure to provide some feedback, your work is so important. I dropped the practice while I was not feeling great, all my energy was going into recovery and right after I was required to go back to the office to train my replacement, it was a couple of hectic weeks for me and not practicing any mindfulness has definitely impacted on my perception of baby movement and connection. These weeks gave me an important understanding of how paramount it is to maintain the practice to help with stress and in my case anxiety. Before I felt unwell I was feeling much more present, my sleep was better, no running thoughts in the middle of the night, I was more focused on the miracle of growing a baby. The chapter of your book gave me examples of how to expand that communication with baby, allowing me to understand I am ‘we’ not ‘I’ anymore. Thank you so much for your course and I am so glad to hear Australia has been given you the opportunity to continue your research. Looking forward to the 10-12 week catch up". SARAH
"I intend to breastfeed as long as the baby and I enjoy the experience. I felt labour and birth to unfold in harmony and according to an intelligent communication between every cell, organ, and with the baby. If something goes wrong, this balance is altered, and the mother’s fear can freeze the process. The foundations of mindfulness are there, in the labour/birth process positive outcome. Thank you for your course, which has enhanced my awareness of these interconnections and trust in the process". SARAH
"Good morning Antonella, thank you for all your support throughout the study. It was a lovely experience and I’m very grateful to have been part of it. Thank you for creating the space for us to share our birth stories. I’ve talked with so many new mums and it’s mind blowing how many of us can’t stop talking about our birth experiences (good or bad) - what’s more many don’t get the opportunity to share it because they just don’t get given the space to do so!" JEANELLE
"Lots of hard work going into this study, but could be a huge step forward in empowering women to take “responsibility” (for a lack of a better word) for their births and not be afraid of it but to trust in its perfect design. I look forward to it". JEANELLE
"During your mindfulness course I took all the information and used it during labour and birth. Baby was very calm when he came. It was amazing. During labour I was up and using long deep breathing, vocalising very laud. I had learnt to make deep sounds, pushing down. I did visualisation. I went into the pool when I was in deep labour. The father was very helpful. I will breastfeed until the baby and I both enjoy the experience. Birth practitioners are very medicalised, burnt out. We need non-biased information from doctors. Women’s birth trauma scares mothers. It is so empowering to watch women’s unassisted birth". JEANELLE
"The mindfulness practice has helped me not only connect with my unborn baby but also connect and deal with my toddler. I have learnt to pause and not react immediately when my child has a tantrum but to create a space to listen to his emotions. I can now understand him better and connect. I have realised that defining a child naughty is an adult projection, and that what we define a naughty behaviour is just the child’s being acting out, or his way of expressing his needs. I also know now that I will go through labour without needing an epidural and accept whatever happens without having expectations". JILLY
"I have learnt to stay with my feelings rather than denying or escaping them. If I am sad, I just accept and savour my sadness knowing that it is a state and is passing. Communicating with my baby gives me a great motivation to overcome challenging moments. It is a wonderful feeling to perceive the baby’s movements and know he communicates through them". BRIANNA.
"I am now able to slow down, be with the present moment, rather than rushing all the time. Even when I am busy, I can take a few minutes to come back to my breath and calm. Knowing that I can do it gives me great relief and allows me to connect with my baby". MICHELLE
"I had an expectedly long labour of 29 hours with back labour, very painful experience. I tried to go without medication as much as possible and aimed to birth in the bath. I used mindfulness mostly to get me through my contractions - I used the skills I had learned of being in tune with my body, mindful breathing, acceptance and also visualisation to get me through the pain of each contraction and I used them to help me avoid fighting the contractions. I found breathing and mindfulness of my body to be my most useful tools. I felt in control for most of the labour, and was left much to my own by the midwives. I felt happy to be in tune with my body and baby and do what my intuition told me to do regarding positions and movement. They were great and let me do what I needed. Though unfortunately I in the end needed an emergency spinal tap, forceps and episiotomy. I definitely think that the mindfulness training helped me relinquish control here and I found myself far less anxious that I anticipated I would be if this had happened." MICHELLE
"I felt that the program assisted me with acceptance of the unknown during pregnancy, and the practice of mindful moments grounded me when my thoughts began to be thrown into worrying about the future. I really appreciated taking time in my day to have quiet moments to focus on my breath and body and connect with my baby. I definitely feel that I formed a very deep connection with my baby when she was in utero and the program helped facilitate this. The same with labour, as I mentioned before - mindfulness of breath and body helped coach me through my contractions and feel in control and present". MICHELLE